Family relationships can be complex, and at times, distancing yourself from certain members might seem necessary. But what guidance does the Bible offer on this issue? While the Bible speaks of honoring parents and family unity, there are also passages that talk about setting boundaries when relationships are harmful. Let’s look at what Scripture has to say about balancing family ties with personal well-being.
Also Read: What Does The Bible Say About Evil In The World
What Does The Bible Say About Divorce
Matthew 19:9
“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.”
This verse emphasizes the seriousness of divorce and its connection to adultery. It clarifies that divorce should only be permissible in cases of sexual immorality, and any other divorce followed by remarriage is considered adulterous.
The verse underscores the importance of faithfulness and commitment within the marriage covenant, highlighting the need to seek reconciliation and forgiveness rather than opting for divorce.
Mark 10:11-12
“He answered, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery.'”
These verses reiterate the teachings of Jesus on divorce and adultery. They affirm that divorce followed by remarriage is considered adultery, regardless of whether it is initiated by the husband or the wife.
These verses emphasize the sanctity and permanence of marriage, urging couples to work through their differences and seek reconciliation rather than resorting to divorce.
Malachi 2:16
“For the Lord, the God of Israel, says: I hate divorce and marital separation and him who covers his garment [his wife] with violence. Therefore keep a watch upon your spirit [that it may be controlled by My Spirit], that you deal not treacherously and faithlessly [with your marriage mate].”
This verse clearly expresses God’s attitude towards divorce, stating that He hates divorce and the violence that can accompany it. It serves as a reminder to guard our hearts and maintain faithfulness in our marriages.
God desires marriages that are characterized by love, respect, and commitment, and this verse encourages believers to be diligent in maintaining healthy and thriving relationships.
1 Corinthians 7:10-11
“To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.”
These verses provide clear instructions to married couples, emphasizing the importance of staying committed to one’s spouse. It encourages wives not to separate from their husbands and husbands not to divorce their wives.
However, in cases where separation does occur, it encourages a pursuit of reconciliation rather than pursuing a new relationship or remarriage.
Matthew 5:31-32
“It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”
These verses address the issue of divorce within the context of Jewish law and customs. Jesus challenges the prevailing notion that divorce is permissible as long as a certificate of divorce is given.
He asserts that divorce, with the exception of sexual immorality, leads to adultery and holds the person initiating the divorce responsible for the consequences that the divorced spouse may face. The verse also warns against marrying someone who has been divorced, as it is considered adultery.
1 Corinthians 7:15
“But if the unbeliever leaves, let it be so. The brother or the sister is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.”
This verse addresses situations where one partner in a marriage is an unbeliever and chooses to leave. It explains that in such cases, the believing spouse is not bound by the marriage covenant.
While divorce is not encouraged, this verse highlights the importance of living in peace and maintaining healthy relationships, even if it means accepting the dissolution of the marriage due to differences in faith.
Matthew 19:6
“So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
This verse emphasizes the unity and sacredness of marriage. It highlights the divine joining of two individuals and cautions against any attempt to separate what God has brought together.
It serves as a reminder to couples of the importance of honoring the marriage covenant and seeking reconciliation rather than pursuing divorce.
Deuteronomy 24:1-4
“If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled.”
These verses outline the guidelines for divorce as specified in the Old Testament. They state that if a man marries a woman and finds something indecent about her, he can issue a certificate of divorce.
However, once the woman remarries and either gets divorced again or becomes widowed, her first husband is not permitted to marry her again. This regulation highlights the finality of divorce and the consequences it may have on future relationships.
1 Corinthians 7:39
“A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord.”
This verse addresses the topic of remarriage after the death of a spouse. It states that a woman is bound to her husband as long as he is alive but is free to marry again if her husband dies.
However, it also underscores the importance of marrying someone who shares the same faith, emphasizing the need for believers to be discerning in their choice of a new spouse.
Ephesians 5:31
“For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”
This verse highlights the concept of the marital union as a bond that surpasses all other familial relationships. It refers to the sacred and inseparable bond between a husband and wife, emphasizing the oneness that is formed through marriage.
By quoting from the book of Genesis, it reminds couples of the durable and lifelong commitment they have made to one another.
Genesis 2:24
“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.”
This verse serves as the foundation for the biblical understanding of marriage. It explains that a man leaves his parents and becomes united with his wife, forming a new and intimate union.
It emphasizes the exclusive and permanent nature of the marital relationship, stressing the importance of loyalty, commitment, and leaving behind previous attachments in order to build a strong and lasting marriage.
1 Timothy 5:14
“So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander.”
These verses provide guidance specifically for widows. The apostle Paul advises younger widows to consider remarriage to fulfill their desires to have a family and maintain a stable home life.
This counsel aims to protect them from vulnerability and possible criticism from outsiders, recognizing the benefits of a supportive marital relationship within the broader context of personal and community well-being.
Isaiah 50:1
“This is what the Lord says: ‘Where is your mother’s certificate of divorce with which I sent her away? Or to which of my creditors did I sell you? Because of your sins, you were sold; because of your transgressions, your mother was sent away.”
These verses use imagery to convey a message of divine judgment and consequence. God questions the people of Israel regarding a certificate of divorce concerning their mother, symbolizing their abandonment and expulsion from the land due to their sins.
The passage serves as a reminder that divorce is not in accordance with God’s original design for relationships, but rather a reflection of the brokenness and consequences of sin.
Jeremiah 3:8
“I gave faithless Israel her certificate of divorce and sent her away because of all her adulteries. Yet I saw that her unfaithful sister Judah had no fear; she also went out and committed adultery.”
These verses illustrate God’s response to the unfaithfulness of the people of Israel and their idolatry. It depicts God giving Israel a certificate of divorce as a symbol of their spiritual separation and judgment.
The passage reveals the repercussions of unfaithfulness and the importance of remaining loyal and devoted to God, drawing parallels between the unfaithfulness within human relationships and the consequences of sin in our lives.
Malachi 2:14
“You ask, ‘Why?’ It is because the Lord is the witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have been unfaithful to her, though she is your partner, the wife of your marriage covenant.”
This verse highlights the sacredness of the marriage covenant and the importance of faithfulness within marriage. It addresses the issue of infidelity, emphasizing that God is the witness to the vows made between spouses.
It serves as a reminder to honor the commitment made in marriage and remain faithful to one’s spouse, recognizing the detrimental effects of unfaithfulness on the individual, the relationship, and the covenant with God.
Matthew 19:8
“Jesus replied, ‘Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.'”
This verse refers to the permission granted by Moses in the Old Testament for divorce. Jesus explains that this allowance was due to the hardness of people’s hearts, but it deviates from God’s original intention for marriage.
It highlights the importance of aligning our hearts with God’s will and seeking His guidance in our relationships, reminding us that God’s standards for marriage surpass any temporary allowances or cultural practices.
Proverbs 2:16-17
“Wisdom will save you also from the adulterous woman, from the wayward woman with her seductive words, who has left the partner of her youth and ignored the covenant she made before God.”
These verses offer cautionary wisdom against falling into the trap of adultery and forsaking the covenant made in marriage. It specifically warns against the allure of a seductive and unfaithful woman.
The passage serves as a reminder of the importance of fidelity and the potential consequences of straying from the commitment and covenant made in marriage.
Hebrews 13:4
“Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.”
This verse calls for the honor and sanctity of marriage within the Christian community and beyond. It emphasizes the need for purity within the marriage relationship and cautions against engaging in adultery or immorality.
The verse underscores the severity of God’s judgment upon those who violate the sacredness of marriage, reminding believers of the importance of maintaining fidelity and sexual purity within the marital union.
Proverbs 12:4
“A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.”
This verse speaks to the significance of a wife’s character and behavior within the context of marriage. It highlights the impact a virtuous and honorable wife can have on her husband’s life, likening her presence to a crown.
Conversely, it warns against the negative impact of a wife who behaves disgracefully, using the imagery of decay spreading through the bones. The verse underscores the importance of mutual respect, partnership, and honorable conduct within marriage.
1 Peter 3:1-2
“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.”
These verses address the role of wives within marriage and their potential influence on their husbands’ faith. It encourages wives to respect and submit to their husbands, even if the husband is not a believer.
The passage suggests that through their godly behavior and example, wives have the opportunity to win over their husbands to faith by demonstrating purity, reverence, and a submissive attitude.
Colossians 3:19
“Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.”
This verse provides guidance specifically for husbands, emphasizing the importance of love and gentleness towards their wives. It encourages husbands to treat their wives with kindness, compassion, and understanding.
The verse underscores the significance of cultivating a loving and nurturing environment within the marital relationship, fostering mutual respect and harmony.
Proverbs 5:18-19
“May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer— may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be intoxicated with her love.”
These verses celebrate the joy and blessing of sexual intimacy within marriage. They depict an image of marital delight and satisfaction, pointing to the depth of love and passion between a husband and wife.
The passage encourages couples to cherish and delight in one another, viewing their love and physical intimacy as a source of pleasure and fulfillment within the marriage relationship.