Divorce and remarriage can be complex topics, and many look to the Bible for guidance in understanding these issues. The Bible offers both compassion and structure when discussing marriage, divorce, and the possibility of remarrying. Let’s explore what Scripture says and how it addresses these life-changing situations.
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What Does The Bible Say About Divorce And Remarriage
Matthew 19:9
“And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”
This verse emphasizes the seriousness of divorce and warns against remarriage after an illegitimate divorce. It highlights the importance of faithfulness and the consequences of adultery in the eyes of God.
Divorce should only be considered in cases of sexual immorality, and even then, remarriage should not be entered into hastily, as it can lead to further sin. This verse encourages believers to work towards reconciliation in their marriages and to seek forgiveness and restoration through the grace of God.
1 Corinthians 7:10-11
“To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife.”
In this verse, Paul emphasizes the importance of maintaining the covenant of marriage. He advises against separation and divorce, urging couples to find ways to reconcile and preserve their union.
If separation does occur, Paul advises that the spouses remain unmarried or seek reconciliation with one another. This verse emphasizes the commitment and dedication needed to sustain a marriage and discourages divorce as a solution to marital issues.
Mark 10:7-9
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
This verse highlights the divine design and sanctity of marriage. It emphasizes the unity and indissolubility of the marital bond, as God Himself joins a man and a woman together.
According to this verse, the union between spouses is intended to be a lifelong commitment, and humans should not strive to separate what God has united. It encourages couples to approach marriage with reverence and understanding of its sacred nature.
Malachi 2:16
“For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”
This verse highlights the consequences of divorcing a spouse without a valid reason and without genuine love. It reveals that God sees divorce as an act of violence and warns against being unfaithful to one’s spouse.
Believers are encouraged to guard themselves in their spirit and remain faithful to their marriage vows. This verse serves as a reminder of the importance of love and commitment in marriage, and the negative consequences of breaking that covenant without just cause.
Matthew 5:31-32
“It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.”
Jesus addresses the topic of divorce and remarriage in this verse, highlighting the significance of faithfulness and the seriousness of breaking the marriage covenant. He challenges the prevailing cultural practice of divorcing spouses by requiring a certificate.
Jesus declares that divorce should only be considered in cases of sexual immorality, and any other grounds for divorce will lead to adultery by both the divorced individual and the one who remarries them. This verse reinforces the importance of marital fidelity and discourages divorce and subsequent remarriage.
1 Corinthians 7:15
“But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases, the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.”
This verse addresses the specific situation where an unbelieving spouse decides to separate from the believer. In such cases, Paul advises that the believing partner should let the unbeliever go and peace should be pursued.
The verse emphasizes that the believing spouse is not enslaved or bound by the actions of the unbelieving partner. God’s calling to peace suggests that believers should prioritize harmony and seek to live in peace, even if it means accepting the separation initiated by an unbelieving spouse.
Matthew 19:3-9
“Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?’ ‘Haven’t you read,’ he replied, ‘that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.’ ‘Why then,’ they asked, ‘did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?’ Jesus replied, ‘Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.'”
In this passage, Jesus is questioned by the Pharisees concerning the legality of divorce. Jesus responds by pointing them back to the original design of marriage, where a man and woman become one flesh and are bound together by God.
Jesus explains that Moses allowed divorce because of the hardness of people’s hearts, but it was not part of God’s original plan. He clarifies that divorce and subsequent remarriage, except in the case of sexual immorality, is considered adultery. This passage reaffirms the sanctity and permanence of marriage as established by God.
1 Corinthians 7:12-13
“To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him.”
In this verse, Paul addresses the situation where believers are married to unbelievers. He advises that if the unbelieving spouse is willing to live with the believer, divorce should be avoided.
This verse highlights the importance of maintaining unity in a mixed-faith marriage and encourages believers to demonstrate Christ’s love and grace to their unbelieving spouses. Divorce should only be considered if the unbeliever chooses to leave the marriage.
Ephesians 5:22-33
“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church because we are members of his body. ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”
These verses provide guidance on the roles and responsibilities of husbands and wives within the marriage relationship. Wives are encouraged to submit to their husbands, just as the church submits to Christ, while husbands are instructed to love their wives sacrificially, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her.
These verses emphasize the importance of mutual love, respect, and selflessness in a marriage. Husbands are called to lead with love and care, while wives are called to support and respect their husbands. The marriage relationship is portrayed as a reflection of the sacrificial love between Christ and the church.
Matthew 5:27-28
“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
Jesus expands the commandment against adultery to include the thoughts and intentions of the heart. He teaches that even looking at someone with lustful intent is equivalent to committing adultery in the heart.
This verse highlights the seriousness of lustful thoughts and emphasizes the importance of purity and faithfulness in the marriage relationship. It encourages believers to guard their hearts and minds, avoiding anything that leads to lust and infidelity.
Proverbs 5:18-19
“Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love.”
This verse celebrates the union between a husband and wife and speaks to the joy and satisfaction found in the physical and emotional intimacy of marriage.
The imagery of a “lovely deer” and a “graceful doe” conveys the beauty and delight that a husband should find in his wife. The verse encourages spouses to cherish and rejoice in each other, seeking fulfillment and satisfaction within the marital relationship.
Hebrews 13:4
“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”
This verse emphasizes the importance of valuing and honoring the institution of marriage. It encourages believers to keep the marriage bed pure and undefiled, avoiding any form of sexual immorality or adultery.
Marriage is a sacred union created by God, and defiling it through sexual sin is seen as a serious offense. This verse reminds believers of the accountability they have to God for their actions within the marriage relationship.
1 Peter 3:7
“Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”
In this verse, husbands are instructed to treat their wives with understanding, honor, and respect. They are called to recognize the equal value of women and the shared inheritance of God’s grace.
The verse suggests that a husband’s treatment of his wife can impact his relationship with God, as prayers may be hindered by mistreatment. It underscores the importance of relational harmony and the mutual responsibility of spouses to love and honor one another.
Proverbs 12:4
“An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.”
This verse acknowledges the significant impact a wife can have on her husband. It asserts that an excellent wife is a source of honor and blessing for her husband, while a wife who brings shame causes great distress and harm.
The verse highlights the importance of choosing a life partner wisely and nurturing a healthy and positive marital relationship. It encourages wives to be women of character and virtue, bringing joy and strength to their husbands.
Proverbs 17:9
“Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.”
This verse emphasizes the importance of forgiveness and covering the offenses of one’s spouse. It encourages believers to seek love by extending forgiveness and refraining from gossip or dwelling on past mistakes.
In a marriage, the willingness to forgive and move forward strengthens the bond and fosters unity. This verse reminds spouses to show grace and mercy, ultimately striving to maintain the intimacy and trust within the marital relationship.
Genesis 2:24
“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”
This verse from the creation account establishes the divine blueprint for marriage. It states that a man should leave his parents to unite with his wife, forming a new and inseparable union.
By emphasizing the oneness of flesh, this verse highlights the sacred bond between husband and wife. It serves as a reminder that marriage is intended to be a lifelong commitment, where two individuals become united in heart, mind, and spirit.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
These verses are often referred to as the “Love Chapter” and provide a profound description of love’s qualities. They are applicable to all relationships, including marriage, as they outline the characteristics that should be present in a loving partnership.
By embodying patience, kindness, humility, and selflessness, spouses can cultivate a healthy and thriving marriage. Love is not self-seeking or easily angered, but rather it stands firm, forgives, and endures through the tests of time. These verses call believers to love one another as a reflection of God’s love for His people.
Proverbs 18:22
“He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the LORD.”
This verse acknowledges the blessing that a wife is to her husband. It affirms that finding a wife is not merely a matter of chance, but a gift from the Lord that brings favor.
The verse implies that a godly wife is a source of goodness, joy, and favor in a man’s life. It encourages husbands to appreciate and cherish their wives, recognizing the value they bring to the marriage relationship.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-12
“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”
These verses extol the virtues of companionship and teamwork within a marital relationship. They emphasize the strength, support, and protection that spouses can provide for one another.
The image of a threefold cord signifies the importance of including God in the bond between husband and wife. This passage encourages couples to work together, rely on each other, and prioritize unity to withstand the challenges and tests of life.
Colossians 3:18-19
“Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.”
In this verse, both husbands and wives are given specific instructions on how to relate to one another. Wives are called to submit to their husbands in a manner that honors the Lord, while husbands are called to love their wives and refrain from harshness.
This verse emphasizes the mutual respect and love that should characterize the marital relationship. It calls husbands to be considerate and gentle towards their wives, while wives are called to support and follow their husbands’ leadership in a way that aligns with God’s will.