Friendship is a gift, but sometimes even those closest to us can cause pain. The Bible provides wisdom on forgiveness, reconciliation, and setting healthy boundaries. Let’s explore what scripture teaches about dealing with friends who hurt us and how we can move forward with grace.
Also Read: What Does The Bible Say About A Wayward Child
What Does The Bible Say About Friends Who Hurt You
Proverbs 18:24
“A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”
This verse reminds us that having many friends does not necessarily guarantee true loyalty and support. It is important to cultivate friendships that are deep and meaningful, where trust and loyalty are present.
True friends are those who stand by us in times of difficulty, offering unwavering support and encouragement. This verse emphasizes the value of having a friend who is as close as family, someone who remains steadfast even when others let us down.
Matthew 26:50
“Jesus replied, “Do what you came for, friend.” Then the men stepped forward, seized Jesus and arrested Him.”
Jesus addresses Judas as “friend” even in the moment of his betrayal. This verse shows us that even when our friends hurt us, we should respond with love and grace, following the example set by Jesus.
In difficult times, we can learn from Jesus to respond to betrayal with kindness and forgiveness, rather than harboring bitterness and seeking revenge.
Proverbs 17:17
“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”
This verse highlights the importance of having friends who love us unconditionally, especially during times of hardship. True friends are there for us through thick and thin, supporting us emotionally and providing a shoulder to lean on.
In moments of adversity, we can rely on our friends to provide comfort, encouragement, and practical help. This verse emphasizes the role of friends as a source of strength and support in our lives.
Proverbs 27:6
“Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”
This verse teaches us that a true friend is willing to confront us and speak the truth, even if their words are difficult to hear. Their intentions are pure and beneficial, seeking our growth and development.
In contrast, those who flatter us with insincere words are not truly our friends. This verse encourages us to value the honesty and constructive criticism that genuine friends offer, as it helps us to grow and become better individuals.
Proverbs 22:24-25
“Do not make friends with a hot-tempered person, do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn their ways and get yourself ensnared.”
This verse warns us about the dangers of forming close friendships with individuals who have a volatile and quick-tempered nature. Associating with such people can lead to negative influences and behaviors that could jeopardize our well-being.
It is important to choose our friends wisely, preferring those who exhibit patience, kindness, and gentleness. Surrounding ourselves with positive influences helps us to maintain a healthy and peaceful life.
Proverbs 19:4
“Wealth attracts many friends, but even the closest friend of the poor person deserts them.”
This verse cautions us about the superficiality of friendships that are based solely on material gain. When we possess wealth and resources, we may be surrounded by many so-called friends. However, genuine friendship is not determined by worldly possessions.
True friends are those who remain loyal and supportive, regardless of our financial status. This verse encourages us to prioritize the quality of our friendships rather than the quantity, focusing on relationships rooted in love and genuine connection.
Proverbs 16:28
“A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends.”
This verse warns us about the destructive power of gossip and the harm it can cause to close friendships. When we engage in gossip or listen to gossip about our friends, it can lead to misunderstandings and the erosion of trust.
To maintain healthy friendships, we should refrain from spreading rumors or engaging in gossip. Instead, we should strive to build one another up, speaking words of encouragement and kindness.
1 Corinthians 15:33
“Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.””
This verse reminds us to be cautious about the friendships we choose, as the character and values of our companions can greatly influence our own. Associating with those who have negative habits and behaviors can lead us away from righteousness.
It is crucial to surround ourselves with friends who share our values and aspirations, encouraging us to walk in righteousness and pursue a life that brings glory to God.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.”
This verse emphasizes the importance of friendship and the strength that comes from a supportive relationship. Together, we are able to accomplish more, and in times of difficulty, a true friend is there to lift us up.
Loneliness can be disheartening, but having a friend to lean on brings comfort and encouragement. This verse reminds us to cherish the gift of friendship and to be there for one another in times of need.
Proverbs 27:9
“Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of a friend springs from their heartfelt advice.”
This verse illustrates the delightful impact of a true friend’s advice. The wise and sincere counsel of a friend can bring joy and contentment to our hearts, providing us with much-needed wisdom and guidance.
True friends hold our best interests at heart and offer advice that is rooted in love and concern. Their words are like a soothing fragrance, bringing comfort and clarity to our lives.
Proverbs 27:17
“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”
This verse depicts the mutual influence and sharpening that takes place in a healthy friendship. Just as iron sharpens iron, our friends have the power to challenge and refine us, helping us to grow and develop.
In a supportive friendship, both parties are willing to provide constructive feedback and to spur one another on towards becoming better individuals. This verse encourages us to seek relationships that foster growth and accountability.
Proverbs 12:26
“The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.”
This verse emphasizes the importance of selecting our friends wisely, particularly those who align themselves with righteousness. Our friendships should be intentional, rooted in shared values and a desire to pursue what is good and pleasing to God.
When we surround ourselves with friends who have a godly influence, we are more likely to walk on the path of righteousness. Conversely, friendships with those who are unrighteous can lead us astray and hinder our spiritual growth.
Proverbs 27:19
“As water reflects the face, so one’s life reflects the heart.”
This verse reminds us that our lives reflect the condition of our hearts. Our friendships play a significant role in shaping our character and influencing our actions.
We should strive for friendships that inspire us to cultivate a heart that is aligned with God’s will, fostering loving, compassionate, and righteous lives that bring glory to Him.
John 15:13
“Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.”
In this verse, Jesus teaches us about the ultimate expression of love: self-sacrifice. True friends are willing to go to great lengths for one another, demonstrating a love that is sacrificial and unconditional.
As followers of Christ, we are called to love others with this same sacrificial love. This verse challenges us to evaluate the depth of our friendships and to aspire to love others with the same selflessness demonstrated by Jesus.
Proverbs 27:10
“Do not forsake your friend or a friend of your family, and do not go to your relative’s house when disaster strikes you — better a neighbor nearby than a relative far away.”
This verse emphasizes the importance of standing by our friends and offering support in times of need. True friendship is marked by loyalty and a willingness to be there for one another in both good and bad times.
In times of difficulty, a nearby neighbor who is a true friend can provide immediate help and support. This verse encourages us to be the kind of friend who stays close and offers assistance when our friends are facing challenges.
Proverbs 27:14
“If anyone loudly blesses their neighbor early in the morning, it will be taken as a curse.”
This verse cautions us about the importance of timing and sensitivity in our friendships. While it is important to bless and encourage our neighbors and friends, there is a time and place for everything.
We should be mindful of the impact our actions and words have on others, always seeking to build up and show love in a way that is considerate and respectful.
Galatians 6:2
“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”
This verse calls us to bear one another’s burdens and support each other in times of difficulty. True friendship involves sharing each other’s joys and sorrows, offering practical help and emotional support along the way.
By carrying each other’s burdens, we reflect the love of Christ and demonstrate our commitment to serving one another in selflessness and compassion.
Proverbs 13:20
“Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm.”
This verse emphasizes the value of surrounding ourselves with wise and godly friends who can guide us in making wise decisions and living in alignment with God’s will.
When we choose friends who are wise and virtuous, their influence helps us grow in wisdom and avoid the harm that comes from aligning ourselves with those who disregard godly principles.
James 2:23
“And the scripture was fulfilled that says, “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness,” and he was called God’s friend.”
This verse highlights the close and intimate relationship that Abraham had with God. It reminds us that when we believe in God and faithfully follow Him, we too can be considered as friends of God.
Being a friend of God is the highest honor and privilege we can have. It is through this divine friendship that we can experience a deep and meaningful relationship with our Creator.
1 Samuel 18:1
“After David had finished talking with Saul, Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself.”
This verse describes the deep bond of friendship that developed between David and Jonathan. Their friendship was marked by unity of spirit, love, and mutual respect.
A true friend is someone who supports and loves us unconditionally, celebrating our victories and encouraging us in our journey. Just like David and Jonathan, we should cherish and nurture such precious friendships.
James 4:4
“You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.”
This warning from James reminds us that our friendships should not lead us away from God or compromise our faith. We are called to maintain a clear separation from the values and behaviors of the world.
While we can and should engage with unbelievers and show them God’s love, we should be discerning in the choices we make regarding close friendships. Our closest allies should be those who share our commitment to following God wholeheartedly.
John 15:14
“You are my friends if you do what I command.”
In this verse, Jesus sets the standard for friendship: obedience to His commands. True friendship with Jesus is characterized by a steadfast commitment to follow His teachings and live according to His will.
By surrendering our lives to Jesus and submitting to His guidance, we become His friends and experience the fullness of His love and grace.
Proverbs 27:5-6
“Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”
This passage emphasizes the importance of genuine and honest friendships, where rebuke and correction are valued. A true friend is willing to confront us when we are headed in the wrong direction and gently guide us back on track.
While it may be uncomfortable to receive criticism from a friend, we can trust their wounds to be sincere and for our ultimate benefit. True friends have our best interests at heart, even if it means speaking difficult truths.