Holding a grudge or having a problem with someone can weigh heavily on the heart. The Bible speaks directly to the importance of reconciliation and making things right with others. But what does Scripture say about having “ought” or unresolved conflict with your brother? Does it call for forgiveness, and what steps should we take to heal broken relationships? Let’s take a closer look at how the Bible encourages us to address grievances, resolve conflicts, and live in harmony with one another.
Also Read: What Does The Bible Say About Hell
What Does The Bible Say About Having Ought Against Your Brother
Matthew 5:23-24
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.”
This verse emphasizes the importance of seeking reconciliation with others before coming to God with our offerings. It teaches us to prioritize resolving conflicts and restoring relationships as an act of worship.
Matthew 18:15
“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over.”
Here, Jesus instructs us on how to address conflicts in a loving and respectful manner. Instead of harboring resentment, we are called to confront one another privately and seek reconciliation.
Matthew 18:21-22
“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.'”
Jesus teaches us the importance of extending forgiveness multiple times, emphasizing the need for ongoing forgiveness and reconciliation in relationships.
Luke 17:3-4
“So watch yourselves. ‘If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them.'”
Jesus challenges us to continue forgiving and offering grace to those who genuinely repent, regardless of the frequency or nature of their offenses.
Romans 12:18
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
This verse encourages us to do our part in seeking harmony and reconciliation with others, promoting a peacemaking mindset in our relationships.
1 Corinthians 6:7
“The very fact that you have lawsuits among you means you have been completely defeated already. Why not rather be wronged? Why not rather be cheated?”
Paul challenges the Corinthian believers to prioritize reconciliation over lawsuits, urging them to be willing to bear the cost of forgiveness and prioritize unity over personal gain.
Galatians 6:1
“Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.”
This verse teaches us to approach those who have fallen into sin with gentleness and humility, seeking their restoration rather than condemnation.
Ephesians 4:26-27
“In your anger do not sin: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.”
Paul exhorts believers to resolve conflicts quickly and not allow anger to fester, recognizing that unresolved anger can provide an opportunity for the enemy to cause further division.
Ephesians 4:31-32
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
This verse calls us to eliminate negative emotions and behaviors and instead display kindness, compassion, and forgiveness towards one another, imitating God’s forgiveness through Christ.
Colossians 3:13
“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
Paul reminds us to be patient with one another and extend forgiveness, drawing from the model of how God has forgiven us through Christ.
James 1:19-20
“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.”
James advises us to approach conflicts with an attitude of humility, actively listening and restraining our anger, recognizing that anger does not lead to godly resolutions.
1 John 4:20
“Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have not seen.”
John emphasizes that our love for God is closely tied to our love for others. If we claim to love God but harbor hatred towards our fellow believers, we deceive ourselves.
Matthew 5:9
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.”
Jesus teaches that those who actively pursue peace and reconciliation are seen as children of God, reflecting God’s character and promoting harmony among believers.
Proverbs 19:11
“A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.”
This proverb highlights the virtues of wisdom and patience, encouraging us to choose to overlook minor offenses rather than escalate conflicts.
Proverbs 25:9
“If you take your neighbor to court, do not betray another’s confidence,”
This verse cautions against betraying the trust of others by involving the legal system in resolving personal disputes, urging us to prioritize trust and confidentiality in our relationships.
Proverbs 17:14
“Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam; so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out.”
This proverb warns us of the destructive nature of quarrels and encourages us to seek resolution and reconciliation before minor disagreements escalate into larger disputes.
Proverbs 18:19
“A brother wronged is more unyielding than a fortified city; disputes are like the barred gates of a citadel.”
This verse highlights the difficulty of reconciling with a brother or sister who feels wronged, underscoring the importance of resolving conflicts promptly and avoiding the buildup of resentment.
Proverbs 26:21
“As charcoal to embers and as wood to fire, so is a quarrelsome person for kindling strife.”
This proverb illustrates the destructive nature of quarrelsome behavior, warning us of the potential harm caused by engaging in unnecessary arguments and disputes.
Proverbs 29:22
“An angry person stirs up conflict, and a hot-tempered person commits many sins.”
This verse emphasizes the destructive consequences of anger and advises us to exercise self-control, recognizing that an angry disposition can lead to prolonged conflicts and a cycle of sin.
Romans 14:19
“Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.”
Paul admonishes believers to prioritize actions that promote peace and encourage the growth and well-being of one another, fostering unity in the body of Christ.
Hebrews 12:14
“Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord.”
This verse urges us to strive for peaceful relationships and personal holiness, recognizing that these are intertwined and essential for our witness as followers of Christ.
1 Peter 3:8-9
“Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.”
Peter encourages believers to cultivate qualities such as unity, empathy, love, compassion, and humility in their relationships, promoting a culture of forgiveness and blessing others rather than seeking revenge.
1 Peter 4:8
“Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”
Peter emphasizes the power of love in extending grace and forgiveness to one another, allowing us to overlook and forgive a multitude of offenses.
1 John 2:9-11
“Anyone who claims to be in the light but hates a brother or sister is still in the darkness. Anyone who loves their brother and sister lives in the light, and there is nothing in them to make them stumble. But anyone who hates a brother or sister is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness. They do not know where they are going because the darkness has blinded them.”
John emphasizes that our love for one another is evidence of our relationship with God and walking in the light, while harboring hatred is characteristic of spiritual darkness and blindness.
These Bible verses provide insight and guidance on how to approach conflicts and grievances within relationships. They emphasize the importance of seeking reconciliation, forgiving others as Christ forgave us, and pursuing peace in our interactions with fellow believers. They also caution against harboring anger and encourage us to approach conflicts with humility, wisdom, and a desire for mutual edification. By following these biblical principles, we can strive to build healthy, harmonious relationships that reflect the love and grace of our Heavenly Father.