Holding a grudge is something we’re all tempted to do at times, but what does the Bible say about it? The scriptures offer clear guidance on forgiveness, letting go, and the freedom that comes with it. Let’s explore the biblical teachings on holding a grudge and how they encourage us to choose peace over resentment.
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What Does The Bible Say About holding a grudge
Matthew 6:14-15
“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
This verse emphasizes the importance of forgiveness in the Christian faith. Holding a grudge goes against the principle of forgiveness that Christ taught. It reminds us that if we want to receive God’s forgiveness, we must also extend forgiveness to others.
Holding a grudge not only hinders our spiritual growth but also creates bitterness and resentment. By letting go of grudges and forgiving those who have wronged us, we free ourselves from the heavy burden of anger and allow God’s grace to work in our hearts.
Ephesians 4:31-32
“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
This passage highlights the negative consequences of holding onto grudges, such as bitterness, anger, and malice. As Christians, we are called to let go of these destructive emotions and instead show kindness, compassion, and forgiveness to others.
Just as God has forgiven us through Jesus Christ, we are called to extend that same forgiveness to others. By choosing to let go of grudges and extending grace, we reflect God’s love and mercy to those around us, fostering peace and reconciliation in our relationships.
Colossians 3:13
“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
In this verse, we are reminded of the need to bear with one another and forgive each other, following the example set by the Lord. Holding onto grudges can create division and disharmony within the body of Christ, but forgiveness promotes unity and reconciliation.
As Christians, we are called to imitate Christ’s forgiveness and offer it freely to those who have wronged us. When we choose to forgive, we not only release others from the burden of our grudges but also experience the freedom and healing that comes from letting go of bitterness.
Mark 11:25
“And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”
This verse emphasizes the connection between forgiveness and answered prayer. Holding grudges can hinder our relationship with God and hinder our prayers from being heard. By choosing to forgive, we align our hearts with God’s heart of forgiveness.
When we release our grudges and choose to forgive, we open the door for God’s forgiveness to flow into our lives. Forgiveness is not just an act of obedience but also a key to experiencing God’s love and mercy in our own lives.
Luke 6:37
“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.”
This verse reminds us of the interconnectedness of forgiveness and judgment. When we hold onto grudges, we often find ourselves passing judgment and condemnation on others. However, Jesus teaches us to extend forgiveness instead.
By choosing to forgive, we break free from the cycle of judgment and condemnation. As we release others from our grudges, we create space for God’s grace and mercy to transform our hearts and relationships.
Matthew 18:21-22
“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.’
In this passage, Peter seeks clarity on how many times he should forgive someone who wrongs him. Jesus responds with the command to extend forgiveness repeatedly, highlighting the limitless nature of God’s forgiveness.
Holding grudges puts a limit on our capacity to extend forgiveness. However, with Christ’s example in mind, we are called to forgive without counting or keeping track, mirroring God’s abundant and boundless forgiveness towards us.
Proverbs 19:11
“A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.”
Wisdom and patience go hand in hand in this verse. Rather than holding onto grudges and seeking vengeance, exercising wisdom allows us to see beyond the offense and choose to overlook it.
By overlooking offenses and extending grace, we demonstrate the glory and beauty of a forgiving heart. Choosing forgiveness over grudges reflects godly character and brings about peace and reconciliation in our relationships.
James 5:9
“Don’t grumble against one another, brothers and sisters, or you will be judged. The Judge is standing at the door!”
This verse is a powerful reminder of the dangers of holding grudges and harboring resentment towards others. When we grumble and harbor bitterness, we position ourselves for judgment.
Instead of allowing grudges to consume us, we are called to seek reconciliation and forgiveness. By addressing conflicts and grievances in a healthy and biblical way, we can avoid judgment and promote unity within the body of Christ.
Romans 12:19
“Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord.”
This verse confronts the temptation to seek revenge when we are wronged, instead urging us to surrender our desire for vengeance to God. Holding grudges often stems from a desire to seek justice in our own way.
By choosing not to take revenge and leaving room for God’s justice, we demonstrate trust in His sovereignty. Letting go of grudges allows us to rely on God’s ultimate justice and focus on forgiveness and healing instead.
Matthew 5:23-24
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First, go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.”
This verse encourages us to prioritize reconciliation and forgiveness over religious rituals and offerings. It teaches us that holding grudges can hinder our relationship with God and our worship.
Before approaching God with our offerings and worship, it is important to address any unresolved conflicts and seek reconciliation with those we have wronged or who have wronged us. By doing so, we create an atmosphere of peace and unity in our relationship with God and others.
Matthew 18:15
“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over.”
Forgiveness and reconciliation go hand in hand in this verse. When someone wrongs us, it is important to address the issue directly with them. Holding grudges without seeking resolution only perpetuates conflict and division.
By approaching the person privately and seeking understanding and resolution, we open the door for forgiveness and potential reconciliation. Holding onto grudges hinders this process and keeps us trapped in a cycle of bitterness and strife.
1 Corinthians 13:4-5
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.”
In this well-known passage, we find a description of true love. Love is incompatible with holding grudges, as it does not keep a record of wrongs. Instead, love chooses to extend forgiveness and let go of past offenses.
By cultivating a heart of love, we can release the grip of grudges and choose to walk in forgiveness. Love seeks unity, healing, and reconciliation, paving the way for healthy relationships based on God’s unconditional love.
1 Peter 3:9
“Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.”
When we hold grudges, it is easy to fall into the trap of seeking revenge or responding in kind to those who have wronged us. However, this verse teaches us to respond to evil with blessings.
Choosing to bless instead of seeking retribution reflects the character of Christ and shows the transformative power of forgiveness. By breaking the cycle of retaliation, we set ourselves up to receive the blessings God has prepared for us.
Luke 17:3-4
“So watch yourselves. If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them.”
This passage shows the extent to which we are called to forgive those who have wronged us. It challenges us to extend forgiveness even when we feel like the offenses are repeated and ongoing.
Holding grudges only perpetuates the cycle of hurt and bitterness. By choosing to forgive, even when it is difficult, we break free from this cycle and create an environment for restoration and healing.
Proverbs 17:9
“Whoever would foster love covers over an offense, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.”
This verse highlights the importance of not dwelling on past offenses. Holding grudges and bringing up past wrongs can damage relationships and cause division.
Instead, choosing to cover over offenses with love and forgiveness fosters healthy and thriving relationships. This requires a willingness to let go of grudges and extend grace, ultimately strengthening the bonds of friendship and unity.
Romans 12:17-18
“Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
This verse encourages us to take the high road and refrain from seeking revenge or repaying evil. Instead, we are called to do what is right and strive for peace with everyone, as much as it depends on us.
Choosing forgiveness over holding grudges allows us to navigate conflicts with grace and humility, promoting peace and reconciliation. By refusing to fall into the trap of retaliation, we reflect Christ’s character and become agents of peace in a broken world.
Proverbs 10:12
“Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs.”
When we hold grudges and harbor hatred in our hearts, it only serves to escalate conflicts and breed further animosity. This verse reminds us that love has the power to cover over all wrongs.
Choosing forgiveness and extending love allows us to break the cycle of conflict and promote healing. By covering past wrongs with love, we create an atmosphere of reconciliation and unity, reflecting God’s heart for His people.
Matthew 18:35
“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
This verse underscores the importance of forgiving others from our hearts. Holding grudges and refusing to forgive can have consequences in our relationship with God.
Forgiving from the heart involves a genuine release of resentment and a willingness to let go of past wrongs. By extending true forgiveness, we align ourselves with God’s forgiveness and allow His transformative power to work in our lives.
Acts 7:60
“Then he fell on his knees and cried out, ‘Lord, do not hold this sin against them.’ When he had said this, he fell asleep.”
This verse describes the last words of Stephen, the first Christian martyr, as he faced death. In the face of intense persecution, Stephen demonstrates forgiveness and love, even for his executioners.
Stephen’s example challenges us to let go of our grudges and extend forgiveness, even in the most difficult circumstances. By choosing forgiveness, we display God’s grace and mercy in the face of adversity and persecution.
Matthew 5:44
“But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.”
This verse calls us to a radical form of forgiveness and love. It challenges us to not only forgive those who have wronged us but also to actively love and pray for our enemies and those who persecute us.
Holding grudges against our enemies goes against the example of Christ, who prayed for forgiveness while on the cross. By emulating His love and forgiveness, we demonstrate the transformative power of grace and reflect God’s unconditional love.
Colossians 3:13-14
“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”
In this passage, forgiveness is presented as a virtue that believers should cultivate. We are called to bear with one another and extend forgiveness, just as the Lord forgave us.
By choosing to forgive, we display love, which acts as a binding force in our relationships. Love is the foundation on which all other virtues are built, and forgiveness is a key aspect of living out this love in our interactions with others.