Living together before marriage is becoming increasingly common, but what does the Bible say about this practice? The scriptures offer clear guidance on relationships, marriage, and the importance of commitment. Let’s explore the biblical perspective on cohabitation and what it means for couples today.
Also Read: What Does The Bible Say About hair
What Does The Bible Say About living together unmarried
1 Corinthians 7:8-9
“Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.”
In this passage, the Apostle Paul acknowledges that remaining unmarried can be a valid and honorable choice. However, he also recognizes that not everyone has the ability to live a celibate life and may struggle with sexual temptation. In such cases, Paul advises that it is better to marry and fulfill those desires within the bounds of a marital relationship.
This verse emphasizes the importance of self-control and discernment when considering the decision to live together unmarried. It encourages individuals to honestly evaluate their ability to remain pure and highlights the potential risks associated with indulging in sexual desires outside of marriage.
Hebrews 13:4
“Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.”
This verse reminds us of the sanctity of marriage and the importance of keeping the marriage bed pure. It warns against engaging in sexual immorality, which includes any sexual activity outside the boundaries of marriage. God’s judgment is mentioned to emphasize the seriousness of this sin.
Living together unmarried goes against the biblical understanding of marriage as a covenant between a man and a woman. This verse encourages unmarried couples to honor the sacred institution of marriage by abstaining from sexual activity until they are properly married.
1 Thessalonians 4:3-4
“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor.”
These verses emphasize the importance of purity in our lives as believers. It is God’s will for us to live in sanctification, which includes abstaining from sexual immorality. The phrase “possess his own vessel” refers to having self-control over our bodies and desires.
Living together unmarried involves the risk of falling into sexual immorality and disregards the biblical mandate for sexual purity. As Christians, we are called to honor God with our bodies and to exercise self-control in our relationships.
1 Corinthians 6:18
“Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually, sins against their own body.”
This verse emphasizes the seriousness of sexual sin and urges believers to actively flee from it. Unlike other sins committed externally, sexual sin directly affects our own bodies, highlighting its unique consequences and impact. By fleeing from sexual immorality, we demonstrate our commitment to honoring God’s commands.
Living together unmarried exposes individuals to constant temptation and the increased risk of engaging in sexual immorality. This verse underscores the need to separate from such situations and actively pursue a lifestyle that is pleasing to God.
Ephesians 5:3
“But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God’s holy people.”
God calls His people to a higher standard, one that rejects any form of sexual immorality, impurity, or greed. This verse reminds us that as Christians, we are to be set apart and live in a way that reflects God’s holiness.
Living together unmarried involves a compromise of this holy standard, as it allows for sexual immorality and fosters an environment of impurity. This verse encourages believers to distance themselves from such behaviors and to strive towards a lifestyle marked by purity and righteousness.
Colossians 3:5
“Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires, and greed, which is idolatry.”
In this verse, the Apostle Paul exhorts believers to rid themselves of the sinful behaviors associated with their old, earthly nature. Sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires, and greed are listed as sins that should be put to death in our lives.
Living together unmarried perpetuates these sinful patterns and encourages behaviors that contradict the teachings of Scripture. This verse challenges believers to actively reject and eliminate such behaviors from their lives, choosing instead to honor God in all areas, including relationships.
Galatians 5:19-21
“The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity, and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions, and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.”
These verses list various acts of the flesh, including sexual immorality, as evidence of a life led by the sinful nature. They serve as a warning that those who persistently engage in such behaviors will not inherit the kingdom of God.
Living together unmarried falls within the realm of sexual immorality, which is condemned in this passage. It is a lifestyle choice that contradicts the character and values expected of those who seek to follow Christ. These verses reinforce the need for believers to turn away from such worldly behaviors and pursue a life characterized by the fruits of the Holy Spirit.
1 Corinthians 7:2
“But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.”
This verse acknowledges the power of sexual temptation and suggests that marriage is God’s ordained solution for containing and channeling those desires. It recognizes the importance of a committed marital relationship in avoiding sexual immorality.
Living together unmarried undermines the biblical model of marriage by engaging in sexual relationships outside of the covenant of marriage. This verse affirms the value of entering into a legitimate marital union and refraining from engaging in sexual activity outside of that bond.
1 Corinthians 6:9-10
“Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.”
In this passage, Paul warns the Corinthians against the deceptive notion that certain behaviors can be reconciled with inheriting the kingdom of God. He explicitly includes sexual immorality among the list of actions that will preclude someone from the kingdom.
Living together unmarried is a form of sexual immorality, which is condemned in this passage. It is a behavior that jeopardizes one’s standing in the kingdom of God, serving as a warning to flee from such actions and seek repentance and forgiveness in Christ.
1 Corinthians 10:8
“We should not commit sexual immorality, as some of them did—and in one day twenty-three thousand of them died.”
Paul reminds the Corinthians of a historical event where many Israelites engaged in sexual immorality and suffered severe consequences. He uses this as a cautionary tale to warn against falling into the same sin.
Living together unmarried is a form of sexual immorality that carries spiritual and emotional risks. This verse serves as a reminder of the potential harm that can come from engaging in such behaviors and reinforces the importance of sexual purity in the lives of believers.
Romans 1:26-27
“Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural sexual relations for unnatural ones. In the same way, the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men and received in themselves the due penalty for their error.”
In this passage, Paul condemns the act of homosexual relations as a deviation from God’s design for human sexuality. He highlights the consequences that arise from engaging in such behaviors.
Although not explicitly referring to living together unmarried, this passage emphasizes the importance of embracing God’s design for sexual relationships and abstaining from any form of sexual activity that deviates from that design.
Proverbs 6:32
“But a man who commits adultery has no sense; whoever does so destroys himself.”
This verse highlights the destructive nature of adultery and the lack of wisdom associated with engaging in such behavior. It warns of the personal and relational harm that comes from straying outside the boundaries of faithfulness.
While living together unmarried may not involve adultery in the strictest sense, it does represent a departure from God’s design for sexual relationships. This verse reminds us of the inherent dangers and consequences that come from disregarding God’s commands in matters of sexual purity.
Proverbs 5:3-4
“For the lips of the adulterous woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil; but in the end, she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword.”
This passage warns of the allure and deception of sexual immorality. It describes the temporary pleasure it may bring but emphasizes the bitter consequences and harm it ultimately inflicts.
Living together unmarried tempts individuals with the short-term satisfaction of sexual intimacy outside of the context of marriage. However, this verse reminds us of the long-term pain, complications, and brokenness that can result from engaging in such behavior.
Matthew 5:28
“But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
Jesus raises the standard of righteousness, emphasizing that sin begins in the heart and is not limited to physical actions alone. He identifies lustful thoughts as sinful and equates them to the act of adultery.
While not directly addressing living together unmarried, this verse speaks to the importance of guarding our hearts and minds against sexual temptation. It challenges us to evaluate the purity of our thoughts and desires, as they can lead to sinful actions.
Proverbs 6:27-29
“Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched? So is he who sleeps with another man’s wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished.”
This passage employs vivid imagery to illustrate the consequences of inappropriate sexual relationships. Just as fire burns and coals scorch, engaging in adultery or sexual immorality has severe repercussions.
Although not specifically discussing living together unmarried, this verse underscores the harm that can come from engaging in sexual relationships outside the boundaries of marriage. It serves as a warning against disregarding the sanctity of committed relationships and highlights the potential consequences of such actions.
1 Corinthians 6:15-16
“Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! Do you not know that he who unites himself with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, ‘The two will become one flesh.'”
Paul addresses the Corinthians’ participation in sexual immorality, urging them to understand the sacredness of their bodies as members of Christ. He argues that joining one’s body with a prostitute is incompatible with the unity believers have with Christ.
While not directly referring to living together unmarried, this verse raises questions about the integrity of engaging in sexual relationships outside of marriage. It emphasizes the sacredness and oneness that God intends for sexual relationships within the confines of a marital union.
Mark 7:21-23
“For it is from within, out of a person’s heart, that evil thoughts come—sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance, and folly. All these evils come from inside and defile a person.”
Jesus teaches about the source of impurity, explaining that evil thoughts and actions are born within the heart. Sexual immorality is regarded as one of the sins that originate from within and defile an individual.
Living together unmarried fosters an environment where sexual temptation can easily flourish. This verse reminds believers that sin originates in the heart and challenges us to guard our hearts against impure thoughts and desires.
Galatians 6:7-8
“Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life.”
This passage highlights the principle of sowing and reaping, emphasizing that our choices and actions have consequences. It warns against sowing to please the flesh, as it leads to destruction.
Living together unmarried is sowing to please the flesh, as it prioritizes the desires of the flesh over the principles and commands of God. This verse reminds believers that our choices have consequences and encourages us to sow to please the Spirit, aligning our actions with God’s will.
Proverbs 7:21-23
“With persuasive words she led him astray; she seduced him with her smooth talk. All at once, he followed her like an ox going to the slaughter, like a deer stepping into a noose till an arrow pierces his liver, like a bird darting into a snare, little knowing it will cost him his life.”
Proverbs describes the seductive nature of sexual temptation, warning of the danger that comes from succumbing to its allure. It portrays the consequences as potentially severe, likening them to the loss of life.
Living together unmarried exposes individuals to continuous temptation and increases the risk of falling into sexual immorality. This verse serves as a cautionary tale, urging believers to be aware of the enticing nature of sin and the potential destruction it can bring.
1 Peter 2:11
“Beloved, I urge you as sojourners and exiles to abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your soul.”
Peter calls believers to live as sojourners and exiles in this world, distinguishing themselves from the destructive passions of the flesh. He acknowledges the ongoing spiritual battle faced by believers against the desires of the flesh.
Living together unmarried exposes individuals to the passions of the flesh, making it difficult to resist temptation. This verse encourages believers to abstain from such passions and to be mindful of the spiritual warfare that rages within, choosing a lifestyle that aligns with their identity as followers of Christ.
1 John 2:16
“For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world.”
John emphasizes the distinction between the world and God’s standards, warning against the allure of worldly desires. He identifies the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life as sources of temptation originating from the world.
Living together unmarried aligns with the lust of the flesh, as it seeks to fulfill sexual desires outside the boundaries established by God. This verse serves as a reminder to resist the pull of worldly desires and to prioritize a lifestyle that is consistent with God’s will.
Living together unmarried goes against the biblical understanding of marriage and sexual purity. The Bible consistently calls believers to honor the sanctity of marriage, reserve sexual intimacy for the marital relationship, and abstain from any form of sexual immorality. These verses highlight the importance of sexual purity and self-control in the life of a Christian. They caution against engaging in behaviors that deviate from God’s design for human relationships and warn of the potential consequences that can arise from disregarding His commands. As followers of Christ, we are called to honor God with our bodies, strive for sexual purity, and seek His guidance in all aspects of our lives.