Forgiveness is a central theme in Christianity, but it’s not always easy to extend it to others, especially when we’ve been deeply hurt. So, what happens when we hold onto bitterness and refuse to forgive? The Bible has much to say about the consequences of unforgiveness and the freedom that comes from letting go.
Also Read: What Does The Bible Say About Judas Iscariot
What Does The Bible Say About Not Forgiving Others
Matthew 6:14-15
“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
This verse reminds us of the importance of forgiveness in our relationship with God. God freely forgives us of our sins, and in turn, we are called to forgive others. Choosing to withhold forgiveness not only hinders our own spiritual growth but also affects our standing before God.
When we forgive, we release the burden of anger, hurt, and resentment, allowing God’s grace to work in our hearts. Forgiveness is not always easy, but it is necessary for our own well-being and for maintaining healthy relationships with others.
Colossians 3:13
“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
In this verse, we are encouraged to bear with one another, meaning to patiently endure and support each other, and to forgive those who have wronged us. Our ability to forgive is a reflection of the forgiveness we have received from God through Christ.
By forgiving others, we show God’s love and mercy to them and invite the healing and restoration of relationships. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting or excusing the offense but rather choosing to let go of the grudge and extending grace to others, just as God has done for us.
Ephesians 4:32
“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
In this verse, we are reminded to not only forgive but also to be kind and compassionate towards one another. Forgiveness is rooted in love and understanding. God’s forgiveness towards us serves as a model for how we should forgive others.
Choosing forgiveness over resentment allows us to break the cycle of anger and hurt and promotes unity and reconciliation within the body of Christ. When we extend grace and forgiveness to others, we demonstrate the transformative power of God’s love in our lives.
Matthew 18:21-22
“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.’
Jesus emphasized the limitless nature of forgiveness in this verse. Our willingness to forgive should not have a set limit, but rather, it should be extended generously and without restriction. As Christ followers, we are called to demonstrate a forgiveness that reflects the abundant grace we have received from God.
Choosing to forgive repeatedly can be challenging, especially when the offenses are repeated or deeply hurtful. However, as we continue to forgive, we free ourselves from the bondage of bitterness and create space for healing and reconciliation to take place.
Luke 17:3-4
“So watch yourselves. ‘If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. Even if they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying, “I repent,” you must forgive them.’
In this verse, Jesus instructs his disciples on the importance of a forgiving spirit. He emphasizes the need to confront the offender and offer forgiveness when they repent, regardless of the frequency or severity of the offense.
Forgiveness does not excuse or condone the wrong actions of others but rather seeks to restore and reconcile relationships. It requires humility, grace, and a willingness to extend mercy, even when it is difficult. By embracing forgiveness, we choose the path of love and reconciliation, mirroring the heart of our Savior.
Mark 11:25
“And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.”
In this verse, Jesus encourages his disciples to forgive as they come before God in prayer. He highlights the importance of a forgiving heart in maintaining a healthy and intimate relationship with God. Our refusal to forgive can hinder our own experience of receiving God’s forgiveness.
Forgiveness is not something we can neglect or overlook in our pursuit of a deeper connection with God. As we forgive others, we open ourselves to the fullness of God’s love and mercy, experiencing the freedom that comes from releasing our grievances and embracing reconciliation.
Matthew 5:23-24
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First, go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.”
This verse underscores the importance of seeking reconciliation with others before approaching God in worship. It reminds us that our relationship with God is deeply intertwined with our relationships with others.
Forgiveness is not just a personal matter between the offender and the offended, but it affects our vertical relationship with God. God desires unity and peace among his followers, and by actively pursuing reconciliation, we demonstrate our commitment to love and forgiveness.
Matthew 18:35
“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother or sister from your heart.”
In this verse, Jesus concludes the parable of the unmerciful servant, highlighting the severity of unforgiveness. God’s forgiveness towards us is extended without limit, and in turn, we are expected to extend the same forgiveness to others.
If we withhold forgiveness, we are in danger of forfeiting God’s forgiveness in our own lives. Unforgiveness binds us in bitterness, preventing us from experiencing the fullness of God’s grace. By forgiving from the heart, we align ourselves with God’s character and open ourselves to the abundant blessings of his love.
Luke 6:37
“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.”
In this verse, Jesus teaches the principle of reciprocity in forgiveness. He emphasizes that the attitude we have towards others will also be applied to us. When we withhold forgiveness or harbor judgment and condemnation, we create barriers to receiving God’s forgiveness.
Choosing forgiveness allows us to break free from the cycle of judgment and condemnation and embrace the mercy and compassion that God freely gives. By extending forgiveness, we create an environment of grace and love, both for ourselves and for others.
Romans 12:19
“Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord.”
This verse reminds us that vengeance is not our responsibility, but rather, it is God’s. When we choose not to forgive, we may be tempted to take matters into our own hands and seek retribution. However, this verse urges us to trust in God’s justice and to release our grievances to him.
By releasing our desire for revenge and choosing forgiveness, we demonstrate our faith in God’s sovereignty and his ability to deal with injustice. Forgiveness allows us to move forward and find healing, knowing that God will ultimately bring about justice in his perfect timing.
James 4:11
“Brothers and sisters, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against a brother or sister or judges them speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it.”
This verse warns against the dangers of slander and passing judgment on others. When we hold onto grievances and refuse to forgive, it can manifest in negative speech and gossip about the offender.
Choosing forgiveness means refraining from speaking negatively about the person who has wronged us and instead choosing to preserve their dignity and reputation. Forgiveness challenges us to extend grace and work towards restoration rather than perpetuating harm through our words and actions.
Proverbs 17:9
“Whoever would foster love covers over an offense, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.”
A key element of forgiveness is the willingness to cover over offenses rather than constantly bringing them up and dwelling on them. This verse emphasizes the importance of maintaining close relationships by choosing to forgive and move forward instead of repeating the matter.
Forgiveness creates an environment of love and trust, fostering healthy relationships and allowing for growth and reconciliation. It involves extending grace, adapting a mindset of restoration, and refusing to let past offenses define the future of our relationships.
Psalm 130:3-4
“If you, Lord, kept a record of sins, Lord, who could stand? But with you there is forgiveness, so that we can, with reverence, serve you.”
This psalm acknowledges the reality of our sinful nature and the abundance of God’s forgiveness. It emphasizes that our standing before God is not based on our own merit but on his unending grace and mercy.
When we fully grasp the magnitude of God’s forgiveness towards us, it compels us to extend the same forgiveness to others. It encourages us to serve God with reverence and gratitude, knowing that we have been recipients of his unfailing love and forgiveness.
Colossians 3:12-13
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
This passage calls believers to embody the character of Christ, to clothe themselves with virtues such as compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. It reminds us that forgiveness is not only a single act but a continual posture in our relationships with others.
By forgiving, we demonstrate the transformative power of God’s forgiveness in us and reflect his love and grace to the world. Forgiveness requires us to be mindful of our own shortcomings and to extend the same mercy and grace that we have received from the Lord.
1 John 4:11
“Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.”
In light of God’s immense love for us, this verse calls us to love one another. Forgiveness is an integral part of loving others, as it allows for healing, restoration, and reconciliation to take place.
Choosing love means choosing forgiveness, regardless of the offense committed against us. God’s love empowers us to rise above our personal hurts and extend grace to those who have wronged us, reflecting the love and forgiveness we have received from him.
Micah 7:18
“Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy.”
This verse highlights God’s character as a forgiver of sins and one who delights in showing mercy. It reminds us that forgiveness is not just an act but a reflection of God’s very nature.
When we forgive, we align ourselves with the heart of God, who constantly extends mercy to his people. Choosing forgiveness allows us to participate in the redemptive work of God and experience the joy and freedom that come from being vessels of his mercy and grace.
Isaiah 1:18
“Come now, let us settle the matter,” says the Lord. “Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.”
This passage invites us to reason with God and experience the fullness of his forgiveness. It paints a vivid picture of how God’s forgiveness is able to cleanse and transform us, turning our sins from scarlet to as white as snow.
When we forgive others, we reflect the transformative power of God’s forgiveness by offering them the opportunity to experience redemption and restoration. Forgiveness breaks the chains of sin and allows God’s grace to work in and through our lives.
Luke 23:34
“Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.’ And they divided up his clothes by casting lots.”
These words were spoken by Jesus on the cross as he was being crucified. In the midst of unimaginable pain and suffering, he chose to extend forgiveness to those who were crucifying him.
Jesus’ act of forgiveness demonstrates the depth of God’s love and mercy towards humanity. It serves as a powerful example for us to follow, even in the most difficult and painful circumstances. Forgiveness has the power to break down walls, restore relationships, and bring about healing and reconciliation beyond our understanding.
Psalm 32:1-2
“Blessed is the one whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the one whose sin the Lord does not count against them and in whose spirit is no deceit.”
This psalm celebrates the blessing of forgiveness and the freedom that comes through the covering of sin. When we are forgiven, our sins are no longer counted against us, and we can experience the joy and peace of a cleansed conscience.
Choosing forgiveness allows us to walk in the fullness of God’s blessing, free from the guilt and shame of our past actions. It opens the door for restoration, transformation, and a renewed relationship with God and with others.
2 Corinthians 2:7
“Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow.”
In this verse, the apostle Paul encourages the forgiveness and restoration of a fellow believer who had repented of his wrongdoing. Paul emphasizes the importance of compassion and support in the process of granting forgiveness, seeking to prevent overwhelming sorrow and offering the healing power of forgiveness.
Choosing forgiveness is not only about letting go of our own anger and resentment but also about helping others find healing and comfort. It requires a willingness to come alongside one another, offer grace, and extend the same mercy that we have received from God.
Psalm 103:10-12
“He does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.”
This psalm highlights the immense mercy and grace of God in forgiving our sins. It reminds us that God’s forgiveness is not based on our own merit but on his boundless love and compassion.
When we choose to forgive others, we participate in this divine forgiveness and offer them a glimpse of God’s love and grace. Forgiveness goes beyond retribution, allowing us to experience the freedom and joy that come from being liberated from the weight of our past wrongdoings.