W.C. Fields was a famous American comedian and actor known for his humorous quotes and memorable characters. His wit often reflected his unique take on life and people, making him a beloved figure in entertainment history. Fields had a sharp tongue and a knack for making people laugh, even with his serious observations. His quotes still resonate with audiences today, bringing smiles and laughter.
Today, we’ll take a look at some of the best W.C. Fields quotes that capture his funny and sometimes cynical view of the world. These quotes showcase his clever wordplay and deep understanding of human nature, reminding us of the power of humor in everyday life. Whether you’re a fan of his films or just enjoy a good laugh, these quotes are sure to entertain.
Wc Fields Quotes
“I don’t believe in luck. I believe in hard work.” – W.C. Fields
This quote reminds us that while luck can sometimes play a role in our lives, it is our effort and determination that truly lead to success. We all have dreams and goals we want to achieve, and it is our hard work that lays the foundation for reaching those aspirations. By putting in the effort, we create our own opportunities, proving that persistence tends to bring rewarding results.
“I never drink water. I’m afraid it will become habit-forming.” – W.C. Fields
“A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.” – W.C. Fields
“There’s no such thing as a tough child, there are only tough contexts.” – W.C. Fields
“I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.” – W.C. Fields
“A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.” – W.C. Fields
“The only thing a man can do is to have fun.” – W.C. Fields
“I like a woman with a future and a man with a past.” – W.C. Fields
“If at first, you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no use being a damn fool about it.” – W.C. Fields
“I have a great deal of trouble with my hands—especially when I try to count my money.” – W.C. Fields
“People are the strangest animals.” – W.C. Fields
“A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.” – W.C. Fields
“Comedy is a show business for the foolish.” – W.C. Fields
“I don’t like to repeat myself.” – W.C. Fields
“Well, it ain’t gonna be easy.” – W.C. Fields
“I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.” – W.C. Fields
“Give me a man who is rich and let me be married to him.” – W.C. Fields
“What a cute little pig!” – W.C. Fields
“I am an early riser and have not yet been to bed.” – W.C. Fields
“I don’t have a bank account. I just carry around a pocket full of money.” – W.C. Fields
“My advice to you is to start drinking heavily.” – W.C. Fields
“I don’t believe in flies. I believe in woolly worms.” – W.C. Fields
“A man who is not a drunkard is not a man.” – W.C. Fields
“I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.” – W.C. Fields
“A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her.” – W.C. Fields
“The best thing you can do is to keep your mind open to any possibility.” – W.C. Fields
“There’s no excuse for poor manners.” – W.C. Fields
“Every time I see an adult on a bicycle, I no longer believe in democracy.” – W.C. Fields
“You can’t leave me. I’m not a bad person; I’m a good person!” – W.C. Fields
“If you can’t convince them, confuse them.” – W.C. Fields
“It’s not the size of the dog in the fight; it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” – W.C. Fields
“I don’t make mistakes, I make spontaneous decisions.” – W.C. Fields
“You can’t hold a man down without staying down with him.” – W.C. Fields
“I’ve been rich and I’ve been poor, but rich is better.” – W.C. Fields
“There’s something about the outside of a horse that is good for the inside of a man.” – W.C. Fields
“I never forget a face, but in your case, I’ll be glad to make an exception.” – W.C. Fields
“I don’t drink water, fish f*** in it.” – W.C. Fields
“Life is not a matter of milestone, but of direction.” – W.C. Fields
“May your happiness be as deep as the ocean, your sorrow as light as its foam.” – W.C. Fields
“I’m on the patch, stuck between Amazon and a hard place.” – W.C. Fields
“Even if we wanted to fight, we couldn’t.” – W.C. Fields
“I’m in the doghouse with my wife.” – W.C. Fields
“I have been fasting in honor of the second coming.” – W.C. Fields
“A woman is an animal that needs constant feeding.” – W.C. Fields
“I’m harder to kid than a kidder.” – W.C. Fields
“You can’t take it with you.” – W.C. Fields
“Funny how a little bit of money changes everything.” – W.C. Fields
“He’s a neat drinker.” – W.C. Fields
“I once got a letter from a fan. He said he liked my work.” – W.C. Fields
“To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone, and a funny bone.” – W.C. Fields
“I’m so glad I could make you laugh. I was worried we might have to cry together!” – W.C. Fields
“I gave my mother a hundred dollars for her birthday. I told her, ‘Spend it on something that will make you happy.’ ” – W.C. Fields
“To be a good actor, think of yourself as a good person.” – W.C. Fields
“I hope to die in my sleep like my grandfather, not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.” – W.C. Fields
“There’s no such thing as a bad audience.” – W.C. Fields
“In America, we can do anything we want. We just can’t do everything.” – W.C. Fields
“Good night. I hope you sleep well and don’t dream about me.” – W.C. Fields
“I will not be a mere spectator in my own life.” – W.C. Fields
Final Thoughts
W.C. Fields has given us a treasure trove of humor and wit through his memorable quotes. Each quote serves to remind us of the joy and humor that can be found in every situation. Whether addressing life’s challenges or celebrating everyday moments, Fields’ clever observations encourage us to appreciate both laughter and connections in our lives.
As we have explored his quotes, we’ve seen that life is filled with opportunities for humor and reflection. The lessons we learn from his words inspire us to approach the world with an open heart and a smile. By embracing humor, we can create relationships that enhance our lives and the lives of others.
Let’s continue to seek laughter and joy in our everyday lives because, as Fields reminds us, humor has the power to lighten even the heaviest of moments. If you’re looking for more inspiration, consider exploring quotes about laughter or quotes about coffee that may spark further joy in everyday experiences.